When you focus your positivity and fuel your inner fire, you develop a natural desire to put that positive energy back out into the world.
A Brief History of Fire
Fire has been a part of the mythology of virtually every culture throughout history. Ancient Greeks believed that fire was one of the four fundamental elements that composed all things in the universe. A sacred source of life and power, fire is, of course, not a substance, but rather a chemical reaction.
When you are gazing at the leaping flames of a campfire, you are observing not an object, but a process. The process of oxidation, the combining of oxygen with another substance, happens very quickly – emitting light, heat, and sound. With enough force and majesty, it is easy to justify the ancients’ reverence.
Three sources of energy are required for fire to exist:
- Fuel (something that will burn)
- Heat (enough to make the fuel burn)
- And air (oxygen)
Extinguishing a fire involves the removal of either the fuel, heat, or oxygen. The energy produced by fire will continue until you remove one of those essential components. Conversely, the more fuel you add to a fire, the more energy you give it – the bigger it gets.
Fueling the Fire of a Narcissist’s Ego
A narcissist is “a person who has an excessive interest in or admiration of themselves.” It is safe to assume, then, that the narcissist’s ego craves attention – good, or bad. To the narcissist, it does not matter; by giving them the attention, we are fueling the fire of their ego.
And, just like a fire, the more we focus on them, the more power we give them – whether we consciously choose to or not. We can therefore deduce, like a fire, that when we decide to redirect our focus and energy, we diminish the power of a narcissist’s ego. Giving them our energy, fueling their power, is something we are choosing.
You Have a Choice, So Fuel Your Inner Fire
If you do not like the behaviors of a person, you have a choice. You can continue fueling that flame, decide to take action toward creating positive change, or you can choose to disengage from fueling their desire altogether. The decision to disconnect, in this context, is not about merely putting your head in the sand, ignoring the problem, and hoping it will go away.
Instead, it is an act of consciously choosing when to engage and still having the mindful awareness of what is going on in the world around you. You are, in essence, choosing when to receive and digest information from the external world.
Self-Care is Not Narcissism
Ironically, we live in a society that tells us that, in any context, focusing on ourselves is narcissistic. But, this is simply not true. Self-care is not the same as narcissism. Self-care is about learning to focus on your well-being, and hopefully, learning to improve (becoming a better version of yourself).
Much of what is happening in our world seems designed to polarize, divide, scare, and distract us. And, as long as we continue to allow it to happen, polarization is exactly what will remain the status quo.
Whether through watch television or engaging in the rhetoric on social media, if something does not bring you joy, it is likely leaving you feeling helpless and upset – a tactic that appears to be working very well.
“Where Focus Goes, Energy Flows”
There is a saying, “where focus goes, energy flows.” By redirecting our energy, focusing it on the positivity of our own self-care, we diminish the power that fuels the fire of the narcissist.
We are all connected, we are all more alike than we are different, and we are all energy – I am, and you are. When we choose to celebrate that oneness, we cannot help to do so without celebrating love and developing compassion for one another.
By shifting our energy, we are mindfully choosing to do the work to become the better version of ourselves. The work of self-care can begin with an act as simple as stopping, taking a look in the mirror, and giving voice to positive affirmations:
- I am a beautiful person.
- I am loving.
- I am compassionate.
- I care about myself.
Unlike narcissism, which seeks the external validation of others, positive affirmation is validation that comes from within. Beginning with small, daily, positive affirmations is a good place to start, it is a step in the right direction, and it is okay.
Fueling the Fire of Nomadic Living
These days, when you think of someone who is nomadic, you picture them as this world traveler, exploring exotic destinations around the globe. But, in reality, that opportunity to travel is a byproduct, and blessing, of making a conscious choice to head in that direction.
At its core, nomadic living is also about the purposeful intention of choosing to live a more solitary life without being physically tied down to any particular place (except, of course, the planet itself). By its very nature, a nomadic life fosters an environment of growth and self-care. After all, no one else is going “fix” things for us when something goes wrong. It is up to us learn to take care of ourselves.
Fuel Your Inner Fire and Change the World
On your own, self-care may seem a small thing, indeed. But, as your self-care continues to grow, you circulate that positive energy with an understanding of oneness. And, when you focus your positivity and fuel your inner fire, you develop a natural desire to put that positive energy back out into the world.
Only then, collectively, when enough of us are focused on fueling our inner fire, will we begin diminishing the power of the narcissists of the world. Starting from a place of self-care individually, together we can create positive change and make the world a better place for all of us.
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